In today’s fast-paced world, parents are facing unprecedented stress and challenges, making it crucial to address their mental health and well-being. This past August, U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy issued an advisory sharing his concerns about the levels of stress parents currently experience. A shocking 33% of parents reported high levels of stress in the past month and 48% of parents describe their stress as “completely overwhelming” most days.
The report identifies several contributing factors that are negatively impacting parents including:
- Financial stress
- Increased work demands
- Challenges in ensuring children’s well-being in the digital age
- The rise of anxiety and depression among children
- Limited opportunities for parents to connect with others
Parents need enhanced resources, including affordable childcare and mental health support
Dr. Murthy emphasizes the growing stressors associated with modern parenting without a corresponding increase in societal or community support systems to alleviate these challenges. In his advisory, Dr. Murthy calls for our society to place more value on parenting and hopes to create a cultural shift. He details action steps to better support parents, such as:
- Providing more affordable childcare options
- Paid family sick leave
- Increased access to mental health assessments and treatment
- Community programs aimed at increasing parent interaction
- More opportunities for parents engagement
Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, parents faced heightened demands and isolation, which has persisted with the continuation of hybrid or remote work arrangements. While parents may enjoy more time with their children, they are missing opportunities to connect with other adults.
Like our children, parents are often not engaging as much. Instead of talking with other parents while watching their children’s games, waiting for children after activities, or in line at the store, parents are often looking down at their phones.
Social media might appear to be a fun diversion, however it often contributes to a culture of comparison with images of perfect parents, leaving many of us feeling inferior, guilty, overwhelmed and alone. While we wonder about the negative influence of technology and social media on our children, as parents, we are often role modeling behaviors that lead us to feeling disconnected and lonely.
Prioritizing self-care and making gradual changes can alleviate stress and enhance overall well-being
While overhauling our daily routines isn’t realistic, there are reasonable things we can do to prioritize self-care. In many cases, implementing even one small change can have a positive impact. Here are a few strategies parents can incorporate:
- Talk to family and friends with a focus on renewing connections with more planned time together without distractions.
- Schedule tech free zones or times of day in your home. Get involved in community activities and strike up conversations with other parents.
- Take time to decompress each day with meditation, a book, a walk, or just sitting in silence.
- Seek help from mental health professionals that can help you implement the changes needed to live a more fulfilling and balanced life.
Sometimes just realizing you are not alone is a relief, as well as knowing you can take these first steps towards the life you want to be living. It really does take a village!
Coaching is an effective tool to help parents manage their stress
Parent coaches like myself can work with parents to create more calm and balance in their daily lives by helping parents learn to show more self compassion and prioritize self care; by working with parents as they learn skills to self regulate when their child is distressed; by helping parents reframe belief systems that keep them stuck, and by working through barriers to improve overall communication and connection between parents and their children.
A parent coach holds space so parents become aware of the changes they want to make that once implemented, can be transformative for both parents and children. My goal when working with parents is that they have an opportunity to feel deeply seen, heard and understood.
When should parents seek individual therapy?
There are times that a parent has been stressed for a prolonged period of time and needs mental health support for anxiety, depression, substance abuse, or unresolved trauma.
A therapist can help parents to better manage anxiety, reduce negative thought patterns, get unstuck when dealing with a lack of motivation, and find adaptive ways of coping with daily stressors.
There can be an overlap in services where a parent benefits from individual therapy while also participating in parent coaching or family therapy to address improving overall family life. Sometimes couples counseling may also be needed when marital conflict is undermining a family’s functioning.
MCCC stands ready to support stressed parents in Rockville, Maryland and the surrounding DMV area. If you are interested in parenting coaching or individual therapy, you can get started here today!
About the Author
Julia Miller, LMSW, is a licensed social worker and certified parent coach at Montgomery County Counseling Center in Rockville, MD. She earned her Master’s degree in Social Work from the University of Maryland and earned her certification in parent coaching from the Jai Institute for Parenting.
Julia combines her expertise in mental health with practical strategies to help parents navigate the challenges of raising children. Julia focuses on fostering healthy relationships, effective communication, and emotional resilience within families.
